Sorting out Problems
A life coach can be very useful for helping you to sort out a problem or situation you have. What if you instead go to a friend for help? Following is usually what will happen.
Last time we talked about the first word which was Balance. Today we are looking at Adaptability.
When you are adaptable, you are open to change. Adapting to change, especially when you do it more or less cheerfully and not bemoaning the fact that you are being forced to make changes, is a very good quality to have. Being flexible can help you lower your stress levels and therefore is good for your health and even your looks—less wrinkle lines and white hair! It can help you to be more pleasant to be around.
Ping Fu, the author of “Bend not Break” sums it up very well:
“Bamboo is flexible, bending with the wind but never breaking, capable of adapting to any circumstance. It suggests resilience, meaning that we have the ability to bounce back even from the most difficult times. . . . Your ability to thrive depends, in the end, on your attitude to your life circumstances. Take everything in stride with grace, putting forth energy when it is needed, yet always staying calm inwardly.”
When you stay in a flexible frame of mind, your intuitive channels are more opened and likely to receive answers. Being adaptable is similar to being open minded—you are not dogmatic and determined to do things ONLY in one certain way, but you are aware that things might change, even your personal modus operandi, and you realize that it is a good thing! There are times when you need to stand your ground and not be spineless—you don’t want to be changing your direction or opinion every 10 minutes, but when the situation dictates that “something has to change” you are willing to go with the flow.
When you are adaptable, you will work towards a solution for a situation that has changed, instead of stopping in your tracks, not knowing how you are going to go forward now, since things are changing so drastically. You might begin unhappily thinking: “This isn’t the way we have always done things!” Actually, one phrase that is the quickest to kill off innovation and moving forward is: “We have always done it this way.”
“Notice that the stiffest tree is most easily cracked, while the bamboo or willow survives by bending with the wind.” Bruce Lee
part 1 of this series: Balance
part 3 of this series: The 6 Kinds of Love
There are 3 words that, when embraced and held close, will greatly help you to be more content with you present situation and also help to propel you forward towards your goals. They are balance, adaptability and love.
Every aspect of our life needs to be properly balanced, whether it be exercise, sleeping, or playing computer games. Once you start thinking in terms of balance, you can start taking steps to have a better balance in all you do and you will very quickly start seeing good results.
When you demonstrate balance in all you do, you will be a lot happier, healthier and even wealthier. I don’t mean necessarily a 50/50 balance, but the right balance for you, which might be different from the person next to you. There are many areas of your life that requires the right balance and it is up to you to personally discover what that is and then to put it into practice.
One area that pops up a lot is work/life balance. Simply put, the work side of your life is what you do to make money to live on, or to enhance your career. The “life” side is everything else; it’s time for yourself, down time, fun time, time with family. It’s time to enjoy whatever it is that gives you pleasure. For many, it can be a real challenge to not let work take over your life. You need to work for survival, but too much work can cause all kinds of problems. Working too much can cause relationship problems. It can cause problems with too much stress. It can cause health problems if you don’t get enough sleep or if you are too busy to eat properly.
Many of us need to watch our diets and it can be a good thing to take steps to cut down on certain foods. But dieting can be overdone and cause worse problems than before we started! So a healthy balance when we diet, or even how we eat in general is mandatory in order to experience good health. Many diet experts suggest following the 80/20 rule of balance: diet carefully for 80% of the time and then relax and eat what you want for the remaining 20% of the time. Of course, you still need to be reasonable in the 20% time zone—you just don’t need to be so careful and strict. This helps relieve diet stress and helps you to do a better job when you are doing the diet.
Start today thinking about what areas of your life could be better balanced and see what you can do to take the needed steps.
When something bad happens to you, it can be very difficult to get anything good out of it. You might be experiencing disappointment, hurt, humiliation, sadness, anger, frustration, shock, defeat–any number of less than good emotions. You also might suffer physically, depending upon what has happened.
However, no matter what the situation, if you try hard enough, you CAN find a glimmer of hope. Maybe not right away, but when you are ready to step back and find out what possible good came out of your recent experience.
It reminds me of the old Aesop Fable, “The Crow and the Pitcher”. If you are not familiar with Aesop’s Fables, they are a collection of fables credited to Aesop, a slave and storyteller believed to have lived in ancient Greece between 620 and 560 BC. They are short entertaining analogies, using animal stories to get across a message. At the end of each is a short lesson learned or “moral of the story”:
A crow perishing with thirst saw a pitcher, and hoping to find water, flew to it with delight. When he reached it, he discovered to his grief that it contained so little water that he could not possibly get at it. He tried everything he could think of to reach the water, but all his efforts were in vain. At last he collected as many stones as he could carry and dropped them one by one with his beak into the pitcher, until he brought the water within his reach and thus saved his life.
I have purposely left out the last line, or moral of this story for a moment. The reason I thought of this story is because it is a wonderful example of taking a possibly disastrous situation and finding a way to make it work for you! In the end the crow not only got what he needed but he also learned a new trick! He made a choice to not be defeated by this apparently bad situation and also learnt something new.
So here is the last line, one you have probably heard of before:
There have been countless inventions and discoveries made out of necessity. If everything was going just right, with nothing needed, there would be no new invention or innovation and instead stagnation.
So the next time you face some kind of a defeat, as soon as you can, make an effort to draw a positive lesson from it. There always will be one, if you look for it, and that will help you rebound quicker.